The Right Way

On Caltrain, conductor's voice over the intercom:

"Please keep cell phone use to a minimum, and speak quietly into your phone when in use. On the behalf of your fellow passengers, we ask you to be considerate, and exercise discretion. Thank you."

No, no, no. Here's how to do it:

"On behalf of all the scam artists and personality thieves on the train, we'd like to ask you to speak loudly and clearly into your cell phone at all times, especially when discussing information of a personal or private nature. Thank you!"

That should work.

Parenthood

Overheard while waiting for a light at 9th & Judah. A mother and her toddler son, I'd guess about two years old, were holding hands and waiting to cross the street.

BOY: "Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy."

MOTHER (annoyed): "WHAT?!!"

(pause)

BOY: "I love you."

If that doesn't just sum it up perfectly, then nothing does.

Today's Casualties

Wellfleet, MA: "... it is believed that a dog in the vehicle may have impeded [the driver's] point of view."

Salt Lake City, UT: "The driver was not cited as he had a green light..."

Clearwater, FL: "The bicyclist ... crashed into the back of a parked mail truck..."

Edmond, OK: "The man was riding a bicycle on a sidewalk ... and lost control..."

Logan Township, NJ: "[The bicyclist] was traveling on the shoulder ... when he was struck by a pick-up truck."

Charleston, SC: "The bicyclist was given a warning citation for disregarding a stop sign."

Utica, NY: "The unidentified driver was found at his residence and ticketed for leaving the scene of an accident."

Obama Speech Aftermath

My six-year-old daughter, along with the rest of her first-grade class, listened to the President's speech on Tuesday. We had the following conversation that evening:

ME: "Did you go to hear Obama's speech with your class today?"
HER: "Yeah."
ME: "What did he say?"
HER: "I dunno."

So much for her indoctrination into The Socialist Agenda. I'll just have to do it myself.

Sweet Streets

Since the last time I was riding regularly, the city has re-paved huge swaths of The Wiggle, as well as Folsom and 10th Street, vastly improving my commute.

I love you, San Francisco!

I didn't see anything peculiar this morning, but I have no doubt the city will deliver on the trip home tonight.

Alembic

I love this place. Old-timey cocktails to die for, made like nobody else makes them.

We were in there on Saturday, and had little roasted duck hearts on a stick. It made me feel like a dark pagan god receiving burnt offerings from my worshippers.

The wait staff and bartenders are pretty well illustrated. When the waitress slipped my Old-Fashioned (Rittenhouse 80, no garbage) onto the table, I saw this on her forearm.

"Money doesn't talk, it swears." -- Bob Dylan

It made me wonder how to tip her.

News of SUV's Death Greatly Exaggerated

The US Dept. of Transportation's CARS program, popularly known as "Cash for Clunkers," reports that the top four clunkers being dumped are Ford Explorers, and top new vehicles being bought are mostly foreign-made economy cars like the Toyota Corolla and the Prius.



Cash for Clunkers (Yahoo)

Is it the death of the SUV? Well, not quite. Edmunds challenged the numbers, pointing out that if you count simply by make and model, instead of treating each configuration (e.g., 2WD and 4WD) separately, the top vehicle purchased is actually another SUV, the Ford Escape, and two pickup trucks actually made the top-10 list.



Analyst disputes top replacements for clunkers (Toledo Blade)

Edmunds: DOT’s Cash for Clunkers Top Ten List Gets It Wrong

Well, it is a bit smaller.